As the Capitol Turns

Missouri State Capitol gossip that’s mostly true

Representative Cynthia Davis is still saying stupid things

This installment finds Sinthia pushing really, really crazy legislation that is dangerous for Missouri’s children. Sinthia has introduced HJR 16, a constitutional amendment that could, and likely would, effectively end enforcement of most of Missouri’s child protection, immunization and provision of education (as weak as they are) statutes.

HJR 16 reads: That parents and legal guardians have a natural and fundamental right to direct the care, education, and upbringing of their children, and that no government action shall burden, abridge, or hinder this natural, fundamental right unless it is in furtherance of a compelling governmental interest and is the least restrictive means of furthering that compelling governmental interest.

This piece of crap has been killed easily in the past. However, the Speaker of the House, in his infinite wisdom, assigned the bill to Sinthia’s very own Hate Women, Love Fetuses, Children are Chattel Committee. It’s coming out of committee, people. Just when we think it can’t get any worse—it does.

Direct quote by Sinthia, when questioned by a committee member on how her constitutional amendment might affect enforcement of current state statute, “I’ll repeat this again for those of you that are fuzzy. This is a constitutional amendment. It only affects the constitution. That has nothing to do with state statutes. The two are not the same, and do not affect each other at all. They have nothing to do with each other.” (Emphasis added.) WTF? I mean, could we make this shit up? I think not.

It’s now official

The Governor thinks so little of the Kansas City Metro that he is not opening a constituent office in Jackson County. We suppose that makes sense, because it would mostly be flooded with complaints about how his staff doesn’t return phones calls. How would the statewide democratic officeholders feel if, in the next election, we just withheld our love for a cycle?

BTW, that doesn’t include Treasurer Clint Zweifel, who has spent more time in Kansas City than our creepy mayor since the general election. We think Zweifel is dreamy….

Tinfoil hats attract unwanted attention

So, Representative Jim Guest’s Real ID bill, assigned to his very own Real ID Committee, was totally gutted this week. This committee has become a favorite of lobbyists and staffers alike, as it is kind of like watching Beverly Hillbillies meets Frasier.

On one hand you have these absolutely delusional, somewhat stinky people pouring out of the hills to talk about how the govmn’t (that’s how they say it) is going to track their every movement—I mean really, who gives a shit what they do as long as they limit their meth cooking to their personal family consumption—and on the other hand, you have committee members who have book learnin’, and even high school degrees, that are just sitting there going WTF? So the committee took all the “not(s)” out of the “shall not” portions of the bill.

The anti-Real ID bill is now the Real ID is not so bad bill, and it has been voted out of committee. The vice chair of the committee was one who voted to gut the bill. The bill the committee was named after. What fun!

Stay tuned, because next week, they are going to hear a bill about chips being implanted into people by the govmn’t. Can’t wait.

A guy got tasered by the guard shack

And no one knows why. It was during a rally with about 500 Medicaid restoration activists in the building, so of course before the smoke cleared (pun intended), it was rumored that a disabled guy got tasered by irate guards missing the drama of the former governor’s complicated personal life. Whatever. It was probably one of those Real ID geniuses trying to pack heat into the Capitol.